For Hannah Marie

Dear Hannah,

As a 27-year-old woman, I finally feel like I am beginning to know myself. There have been many, many joys and harships in life and these experiences are what have allowed me to finally accept and celebrate my assets and flaws, talents, struggles, strengths and weaknesses. 

As a step-mother to you, a 13-year-old girl,  I wish I could take this message and infuse it in your brain: JUST BE YOU. BE YOURSELF. YOU ARE WONDERFUL. YOU WILL STAND OUT.  I PROMISE!

I want you to know that the most beautiful women, are the most confident. But not falsely confident.  Not over the top.  Not vain.  Just confident.  The women that I appreciate most in life, are not neccesarily the ones with the perfect waistline, or the best dye-job, but instead those who laugh, loudly.  And sing at the top of their lungs.  Those who freely compliment others, genuinely.  The women who truly see the beauty in others and believe in the strength that is themselves.

I wish I knew how to help you get past all of the daily struggles that come with being 13.  I wish you knew that the only reason any one says anything nasty about someone else is because they have confidence issues themselves.  I wish there was a way to let you know that what seems important at 13, will not be important in the long run.  Let the cruel words of others roll off your back girl, because thats all they are, words.

Hannah, please don't give away your power. Don't let someone take something from you that you don't want to give, don't let someone make you feel some way that you don't want to feel, don't let someone push you to do something you don't want to do. We all have a power within us that tells our heart and soul what is right for each of us...don't give this power away.  Ever.


Hannah, I want you to know that as long as you are smiling you are beautiful. Clothes, make-up, hair do's don't make the girl. Smiles do!  You have no idea how fabulous you are. But you are. You are fabulous. And when you are true to yourself, you will grow. No, you will soar.


I love you girlie.

Always,

Sarah

HannahEmmaMax

My loves.  There is a lot going on in our household lately.  Here is a brief update of each of our kids.

Hannah Marie:  Age 13 1/2, 8th grade.

Hannah started her final year at Whitehorse Middle School!  I can't believe that she is going to be in High School next year.  Time really flies.  When Matt and I started dating she was just a little girl of 9.  Now she is a beautiful teenager! So, whats going on in her life?  She spends the majority of her time with her friends, or at her afterschool activities (volleyball and dance).  She has a group of really great girlfriends that are truly good girls, so we don't really mind them always hanging out.  She really doesn't seem to be that interested in Matt and I lately...which is kind of sad, but comes with the age.  She doesn't realize how cool we really are.  And she thinks we are old...isn't that depressing?  I swear Hannah, I was really cool just a few years ago.  Ask anyone! Next week is our wedding reception and Hannah is really exciting.  After quite an extravaganza, we finally found her a beautiful dress, and we are both getting our hair done!  She loves stuff like that, and is really quite a girly-girl.  I haven't seen her since last Friday...I hope she comes to our house tonight!  Sharing custody is not fun :(


Emma Rose: Age 2 3/4.

Oh my little Rose.  How feisty you are!  I am truly impressed with Emma everyday.  Her vocabulary is immense and I tell everyone that she is 'fluent in English' now.  She says the funniest stuff sometimes that I am so surprised came out of a 2 year olds mouth!  She has told me that things are 'dangerous', and that we need to 'be careful mama'.  I love her so much.  That too is a new phrase for her.  There is nothing more heart melting that having your child say "I love you" to you.  She always asks us "how was work", or "how'd you sleep".  I love it.  Right now she is obsessed with Halloween and her costume ideas change everyday.  I hope when we finally pick out her costume she sticks with it!  At first she wanted to be a witch, but she says "witch is scary".  Then it went to a princess, and now we are on to Curious George, but sometimes she says she can't be George, because Daddy wants to be him.  Lol.  I love her and am constantly amused by her.  I cherish the days that we get to snuggle on the couch, and just talk.  She's so smart.  I can't wait to see who she becomes!

Max Roland: Age 3 months.

Max is seriously the best baby in the UNIVERSE!  He hardly cries, which is a huge change from what I was used to with Miss Emma.  He smiles all the time, and is starting to laugh!  He rolls over from his tummy to his back already...which makes me a little nervous that he is going to be an early learner in regards to the physical.  Emma was always advanced verbally, but didn't walk til she was almost 15 months old!  I love this little guy so much and am so happy that he is a part of our family.  I can't wait to see how he changes over the next year or so.  He brings back my faith in babies!   My sweet Max.

Well, I guess thats it.  Toodles!

Back to the BLOG!

So, I have had a bit going on lately.  Firstly, our 3rd child, Max, was born on 6/28/10.  Easiest birth ever, easiest baby ever.  Mama is very happy!  I finally feel like our family is complete.  I would ideally like Matt to get a vasectomy now, but he's not all for it.  Prior to having Max, it felt like there was someone missing, and now our family feels perfect.  We are so lucky and blessed and I couldn't ask for more.

This past weekend I went to Eau Claire for UWEC's homecoming and my mini-bachelorette party.  Our wedding reception is on the 15th and it was so great to see all of my ladies.  It's so wonderful when we all get together because its like no time has passed at all and we haven't skipped a beat!  I think that there are very few people who are lucky enough to have friendships like that, and I'm so happy I do.  I can't wait to see them all next week for the PARTY!

I'm still trying to figure out what Emma and Max should be for Halloween.  And Matt and I also have an adult halloween party to go to!  So I need a theme for the kids, and an adult theme for Matt and I.  Any ideas?  I kinda want to be Wonder Woman.  I wonder if Matt would be Super Man.  It would be so fitting.  When I first met Matt when he was a bartender at Nau-ti-gal, we called him Clark Kent.  See the resemblance?

I'm a lucky lady!

37 Weeks

Oh lordy, where do I even begin. Last week I had days of contractions that were pretty regular and about 6-10 minutes apart.  The thing is that they weren't painful and now they have completely stopped.  I think it was because baby boy was moving his way down the birth canal and getting into position.  Now I just feel tremendous pressure 'down there', and can't wait for baby to make his appearance!

Pregnancy: 37 weeks
Weight Gain: 26 pounds total
Sleep: Ha...whats that?  I'm up every hour or so to pee, or my hips aching, or my back.
Gender: BOY!!
Name: Max, Lucas, Cameron, Jack, Miles or Clark...what do you think?
Feeling: Ready. Anxious. Excited. Nervous. Miserable.
Health: Everything is perfect.  Baby Boy's heartbeat is back to normal, and I still have LOW blood pressure, we will see tomorrow if there is any 'progress'.
Movement: Lots and lots.  Its hard for me to believe he is actually head down because it feels like he is turning sommersaults inside my tum!
Belly: BIG and still measuring 2 weeks ahead.  At my last ultrasound at 35 weeks baby was already 7 lbs 8 oz which is bigger than Emma was at 39 weeks 5 days.  Yikes.
Next Appointment: Tomorrow June 9th, then Monday the 14th.

Wow, it's been awhile!

Wow, so its been awhile.  I should probably be better at updating now since its slow again at work.  I'll start with the major updates in our life.

#1.  Matt and I got MARRIED - on April 21st, 2010.  It was a small ceremony at the Wisconsin State Capitol with just our children and parents. It was perfect and there will be a reception to follow after baby is born.

That brings us to #2.  Baby is a BOY, and he is due somewhere between June 25th and July 5th.  My pregnancy has been a lot harder this time, both physically and emotionally.  We discovered somewhere arond 28 weeks that baby has heart arrhythmia and we have had to undergo several tests to find out what is causing it.  The good thing is that his heart is structurally fine, and blood flow to his body and organs is great.  He still has the arrhythmia but they hope that it will go away by the time he is born.  Everything else looks great.  I'm incredibly sore, retaining water, and can't wait to meet my little guy.  We still don't have a name, but the top runners are Max, Lucas, Cameron and Benjamin.

#3.  Our kids are getting so big.  Emma turned 2 in January, and is quite the lady.  She is constantly learning and absorbing information and I'm impressed with her every day!  Hannah turns 13 today!  I'm going to have to change the title of my blog to TEEN! 

Well, thats all for now.  I'll try to be better at this whole blogging thing.

Engaged!

Yes, you read that right.  Matt and I are finally engaged!  I know...I couldn't believe it either, and I am so happy!

On Sunday the 29th, Matt suspiciously took Emma shopping with him, and made it very clear that I couldn't go.  It was strange.  Very strange.  But I knew he was up to something, and I was pretty sure that the something was going to buy an engagement ring (since there were big sales going on around Black Friday!).  Well they weren't gone very long, and Matt came up with a story that Emma wanted to get out of her stroller, and how could he possibly shop with a crabby baby, and all he came home with was a Barnes and Noble membership card for Hannah.  So I was kinda bummed, but this wasn't the first time that I suspected something to no avail!

But a few hours later, Matt took Emma down to the basement to change the laundry, and when they came up Emma was holding a little box!  I was very surprised and instantly got teary eyed.   Then Matt came over and got down on one knee and asked me if I would marry him.  It was perfect and sweet and very 'us'.  I of course said yes :).  I loved how he involved Emma.  It was wonderful.

Thankfulness...

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving....such a wonderful holiday, such a wonderful reminder.  But to tell you the truth, I don't know why we need a National Holiday to remind us that we should be thankful for what we have and for those around us.  I think that we all should be thankful everyday.  My mom always tells me, when I'm feeling upset or down about something, that before bed each night we should think of all the things in our life that we are grateful for, and the things we are upset about will seem much less significant.  She is a wise woman.

I think that our society has become consumer driven, selfish, and gluttonous.  This holiday that is supposed to be about appreciating our family, our health, and what we have seems to have turned into a holiday that first results in people seeing how much they can eat, and then becomes a marker for the 'best shopping deals' of the year. 

I am thankful, and I want those around me to realize how very lucky we are to just be able to be citizens of this wonderful country.  We are able to sit down at a table filled with foods, while others in the world dig in dumpsters, and pray that somehow the water that they are drinking will not make them sick.

As a parent, I hope that I am able to instil thankfulness in my children.  But living in America is hard.  I lived overseas most of my childhood, in poor third-world countries, so I was able to learn how lucky I am to have food, shelter, clothing, and love, but sometimes I wonder how it is even possible to teach these virtues in a country that is so consumer driven, egocentric, and materialistic.  But how can you blame Americans?  We have never seen anything else.  Maybe it should be a requirement in our schools to make it necessary to visit another place where water doesn't come out of the faucet clean and safe.  I don't know and I am very worried.

I think this year we will start with something small...we will ring the bell for the salvation army. I think that we should all pay it forward this year...and good things will happen :)